We thought we had experienced the worst air service with Eva Air, but there are worse! Vietnam Airlines, long distance.
A deplorable check-in service at Ho Chi Minh (unkind and totally incompetent crew), which didn't improve in the plane—particularly concerning a flight attendant who barked at the passengers to offer them tea or a meal tray, as in the most glorious era of communism.
About this tray, at breakfast there was supposed to be a choice between two options: but no! Not having adequately planned at departure, the “less worse” option was not available anymore after 2/3 of the plane had been served. So we were lucky to get a beef in sauce that smelled and looked like vomit, with sauceless penne pasta decorated by two pieces of carrot that tried to make it look good.
Following this, this was a wonderful smell of vomit all over the back of the plane for the remainder of the trip. Let’s move on to dinner: the aperitif—a choice of whisky, gin tonic, or Bloody Mary—described on the menu (a beautiful menu, cover-bound and printed on fine paper) was never offered.
At dinner, coffee was served at the same time as the tray and the drinks, and eat it fast, whether you like it or not. And don’t ask for a refill of wine or water, that’s not on the menu. It was the same as in breakfast: you can ask for more tea or coffee! Seeing this happen, we realized there was a world between us.
And then came the time to be “entertained:” a limited selection of movies, but included at least GI Joe Retaliation, Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, Oblivion, Iron Man 3 (Vietnam Airlines is like sankukai! It’s a battle!), Ah, even Mud and Gatsby! It’s not going to be enough for the 12 hours to come, but…. We thought about doing a movie session after this wonderful dinner. Bingo! We realized it’s like 20 years ago! It’s a VHS tape that is played at the same time for all programs at take-off and too bad if you miss the beginning, you’ll have to wait for the next session in…. Ah, yes, it’s written below, disguised as subtitles: “next start time 1:54 for Gatsby,” for instance. Well, we’ll spend the night listening to music, then…. A wide selection: Vietnamese music, Texas, or Rod Steward…. Ah, cool, Bob Dylan! But it’s not Bob Dylan on the headphones…. Well, another option was “music collection and radio program”…. Well, there’s nothing on the playlist…. So, we’ll go to sleep, huh? It’s the best we can do…. “Vietnam Airlines: Fly and See”…. Spread the word, there’s nothing to see!
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